Wednesday, December 8, 2021
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Wow. Just finding out that Bev passed away in 2017. I'm 69 now, but I was hired as a Claims Clerk by Bev when I was 22 and fresh returned from Toronto and my experience as a Policy Benefits typist. Remembered my appreciation to her when I told her a lawyer was coming to talk to me at the office about my mother. She made sure that I used her office and that I sat behind her desk. So I did. I was just thinking how much that probably influenced how I was able to explain things about my mother and was able to avoid having them use her as an example to anyone else who tries to rip off the government, and they catch you.
She was also the person I called when I found my mother in an overdose state of pills and alchol. Bev was the same age as my mother and because of the "family secrets" unspoken rule, I didn't know if I should call an ambulance or not. So I thought of Bev and after having to slap my face really hard so I could see through the tears, I called her, on a Saturday morning, having brunch with a male friend. I tell her my situation and within a half hour or so both she and her friend were there to help me out.
That experience left long lasting emotional affects and also that Bev was someone I could count on when I couldn't share with my peers. She was the best boss. She could convince me of anything even if I knew it wasn't possible. Like pigeons get pregnant by pecking their beaks because there was a pair nesting on her office window ledge and she watched them. She also told me that even though I hadn't had sex for 7 months, that I could still be pregnant when my period did one of those two week stops before starting again. Didn't know it then though. That was a rough mental couple of weeks. She even convinced three of us younger women to be bunny girls for an Insurance Adjusters or some kind of big Insurance Do. The three of us who decided to go along with it, got our black leotards, bunny tail, and top hat and went to serve, mostly men, at this thing. The three of us probably smoked a joint before hand. I didn't realize what a stupid idea it was until I looked into the room, but it was too late, so I did what I signed up to do. Serve food and drinks. After one of the men made a comment almost immediately that there was going to be a contest amongst all the men as to who could collect the most cotton off our tails was going to win something. I didn't say much but I did reach around and unpin my tail and hand it to him saying something like, here you go, you win. I won't have someone picking at my ass all night. Then I walked into the room where they were doing some press stuff for their records. I was doing some drinking along the way during this event so I just asked if I could have my picture taken. When the guy said yes I plopped down in the seat, did the cheese-cake pose and smiled. Then got up and left and asked if I could get copies. I vaguly remember going with an Adjuster that I was pretty familiar with for a ride in his pink caddilac around Halifax in this bunny girl outfit. I got home safe. I was proud that we were an all feamale Claims Department and we won awards for something or other. Those things weren't that important to me at the time. We grew threw the renaming to The Policy Benefits Department. I grew from a clims clerk typist, to Policy Benefits Clerk, to Telephone Adjuster, to Policy Benefits Telephone Assessor. So many changes for doing the same job. I remembered the Piano Bar at Scotia Square where I was invited to by Bev, my boss, I'm 22,23,24 for 8 years working with and for this woman. Certainly, I was going to go hang out with her and watch her as she interacts with and works in mostly a world of men. Then life took a turn and with all the turns my life has taken me I just am not a person who wants to keep in touch. I can wonder a lot about that but I haven't found a solution to finding some kind of way to keep in touch with the extra special ones. Bev has been gone since 2017 and it answers my question about how to get in touch. I don't know if anyone will see this, but Bev, thank you. I am so disconnected from my own family that it has become normal. I felt sad even though the man I knew as my father had been dead 4 years before I found out about it. Much like now, asking Google the question. Is Beverley Ninos of Nova Scotia still alive? and finding out that Bev is gone. Well. I'm going to try and stick a picture or two in. I'm grateful just for the opportunity to have these memories of her not so much as a boss but a mother figure. Not so much the mother part when she told me at the Piano bar one night after work that she had hired me for my legs. That kind of messed up my 20 something head because it didn't sound as bad when she said it as it did to me when a man said it. Little did I know that when I was in my 40's that I would realize I was gay.
A Salute to Bev Ninos. What a woman. She has a place in my heart and memory for as long as they work and beyond to where ever our spirts go. Maybe I'll be able to give her a hug and thank you then. Until then, Thank you for being a boss and mentor to a mixed up young adult trying to do the best I could for you and the company, but not so much the insurance business. I was grateful for the lay-off after 8.5 years. I ended up being the one who had to handle the bodily injury claims because I did the best at the "friggin'" Insurance Institute somewhere in N.B. where a bunch of us had to go for a refresher course. That was the beginning of the end for me as I had to deal with these claims. Whoopee. I had a $5000 bond to settle claims on my own. I know I began spending a lot of time in Bev's office trying to decide on a settlement offer. The main thing I learned is that if you have a lawyer make some calls that their claim gets settled a lot better than when you know someone else who can't afford a lawyer is not getting paid over a technicality when the one with the lawyer over a similar technicality did. My mind was beginning to wander to other places and doing something more meaningful but didn't know what. Then I was called in and told I was laid off. I sat there and took it in, with tears in my eyes, but with a feeling it was right. So I bought myself a yellow rose after I left and went on to sign up with Unemployment, lived on that for a year doing different things like therapy, Job Readiness program, Family Research, hanging out with new friends, growing, getting older, then being placed in a temporary job placement doing Data Entry. I just realized it sounds like I'm writing my own obituary. So Good night Bev. I've made it to 69 and a half.
